My mom used to say, “Your ears are so dirty you could grow corn in them.” Telling you that I’m growing corn in our basement seems like an admission that I am a terrible housekeeper. Let’s not talk about that, stay focused on the actual corn.
Since moving here I have tried to grow corn multiple years, multiple different setups, multiple reasons for failure. Sun is always a struggle here and even if I can get corn to come up we struggle to get nice tall healthy stalks and if we do get actual ears of corn they are pathetically small. Some of the reasons for failure have been deer, raccoons, ground hogs, chickens, kids, possums, squirrels, ground squirrels, voles, moles, and mice. All of that along with watering issues, bad soil, not fertilizing often enough, and planting in plots that were too narrow have plagued us. We put up a 7 foot tall fence with climbing and digger barriers, this helped a lot. The problem was space. We have such limited room that we only devoted one 4’x4′ box to corn.
I planted the seeds and waited, nothing came up. Hmmm, replanted, nothing, and yet again still nothing. I found out that we had a mouse issue in the garden, we also have a bird issue which is a whole other project protection we need to figure out. We started germinating the seeds in the house and then planting tiny little corn plants in the garden. Come out the next day to find all the tiny little corn plants pulled up laying on their sides. If there was even a whisper of corn kernel seed left on them whether it was bird, slug or mouse the tiny plants stood no chance. We have the same experience with watermelon plants/seeds. Actually a large number of plants/seeds which is why we have given up on trying to direct sew anything.
We built little wire cages to put around each tiny corn plant. Put a plant in the ground, put a cage around it. Came out the next day to find the plants had been pulled up again. Made tiny tops for the tiny cages. The fact that the cage would go several inches into the dirt and now had a top seemed to solve the problem. Imagine doing that for more than 16 corn plants. Now imagine that even with the cages you sometimes lost a plant or two. The last couple of years we have tried grow bags in plastic kiddie pools. This stopped our issue with things that would just dig their way in. We did get corn plants and they did seem to grow we just never got any edible ears of corn. I did get fall decorations so there is that. We also have an issue with earwigs eating the corn ears when we do actually get some.
I watched a video from Lazy Dog Farms where he talked about different issues he has with corn and how to solve them. I had not realized that earwigs will actually eat the little plants I thought it was just the ears of corn they got into. I’ll be better about looking out for that now. We also will have water and fertigation setup for the corn this year and I think that will make a big difference because we just didn’t do enough of either. We are expanding the garden into a much sunnier spot as part of the “build the kiln and expand wood storage” project. This year the corn plot will be two boxes 4×8 with a walk path between them but very close together so close it’s more like an 8×8 plot.
It’s taking us time because we had to fight, er I mean discuss, where the plot would be and how it will all be setup. The landscape fabric came today, we will go get the fencing and T-posts tonight and as soon as the rain stops we can get going on this. Bill has already mowed down the crazy weeds that grow on the side of the shop and I do mean crazy. He battles this area every year. Getting that weed block down will mean his life just got that much better. Once that is down we can run fence and once the fence is up we can empty the boxes in the old garden and move them over to the new space. We already have the compost which means once the boxes are in we can fill them up. Then Bill will extend the water into this new space, and beyond for the new pumpkin patch. With the water setup for corn and watermelons we can start planting.
Now because we have never had any luck planting seed outside I planted our corn inside a few weeks ago. Here they are, I just had to up plant them.
Actually I should have done it some time ago because as you can see the roots are crazy!
This six c
ell work well for removing plants even when the roots look like this. I was able to get them out and not do too much damage. In the past, with the normal six cells, the roots would either wrap around or when they did come out the drain holes and you tried to get them out of the six cells you would pull all the root off. 
I’ve also tried using toilet paper empty rolls. I even used some this year and this time I left the ends open. The roots did great but I feel like I did damage more of them moving those rolls into bigger pots. This plants should only be in these pots for a couple of days maybe a week. If things go as planned we should get the next part of the garden done over the weekend and be ready for planting. But life has a way of not going as planned. Rather than let them languish in their small pots I decided it would be better to just get them in something bigger even if it wasn’t for very long. This will buy us some time and they will be happier.
Meanwhile the corn certainly looks like it will be knee high by July even if it’s still in the basement, lol. There are about 80-ish ears down there and I’m so stinking excited! It might not work but who knows this might be the year where we get an ear or two. I know I’ve made some people cringe thinking about transplanting corn because it’s a no no. For me that’s part of the joy of learning how to garden here. We can’t do conventional and rather than lament about that and wish for what I don’t have or keep trying to do things the way “they should be done” we adapt. Honestly even when it doesn’t work it’s still fun. I go in the basement and giggle because I have a corn field in there along with my pumpkin patch and squash and peas and beans and oh so much more. Do something that makes you happy regardless of the final result. If you enjoyed the journey then you will have won.
Remember when I said the corn was safe in the basement? New predator, the “not our dog” did it. At first I suspected the older cat because she is a terror when it comes to plants. Then I stepped in the evidence on my way into the studio. Corn plants pulled up, corn plants eaten down, corn decimation once again. Sigh it was my fault. I left the door open over night. The door is now closed and the cat pop hole in it is blocked. Surely this time I have thought of everything and protected them. I also planted more seeds to make up for the ones that I don’t think will make it.
